CREATIVE JUICES

I t’s been barely a year since I first saw you. There you were wearing your olive green jacket. You glanced my way but I wasn’t really sure if you even noticed me. Well, sure enough, you saw me but you really didn’t see me. My friend has told me so many things about you. That you already have someone special in your life and that with that looks you have, it’s pretty obvious that you’re a player. It’s very rare that you visit the floor and whenever you do, I can’t keep myself from standing to search every bay and post to see whose PC you’re fixing this time. Am I mean or what? Because sometimes I wish that all the computers in the floor would all crash down so I’ll get to see you the whole day and you’ll never hide again in your secret hideout. But there came a time that I told myself to stop dreaming about you because you’re just too impossible for me, besides I also have someone special in my life so what’s the point of yearning for you. After all, you don’t even know that I exist. T...

“I can’t, you’re my friend’s ex.” These were the words I usually tell you before just to avoid the question that you keep on asking me. I’ve been through a lot and I don’t think I am ready yet to be on the hot seat again and to accumulate all my friend’s harsh words against me. I can say that maybe I was really cursed. Ever since I fell in love, there’s always a hindrance and I can never be completely happy because on the back of my mind I know that someone’s also weeping behind my happiness. Now here you are again, asking the same question and line that’s so familiar to me. I really don’t know, maybe I was really stubborn, I never did learn through all my experiences. When will I ever learn that there’s really “KARMA”? Well, enough of my taking risks. Before I am really proud of that principle of mine, but now… I don’t even know if I have to feel good for taking risks or what. The first time I gave you a White Rose, you were so surprised and don’t know what to say. Of course we’re sti...

It was just an ordinary day like the days before. I was in my room, lying in my bed, while listening to the radio. Then the phone rang… I immediately picked it up and asked who’s on the line. To my surprise, it’s YOU! I never really imagined talking to you because you’re the least kind of person who would call me. I never even knew that you existed. But not until we became group mates in one of our school’s theater play presentation. Then the phone calls became constant, I could say that we instantly jive because we have lots in common, maybe we’re soul friends… or should I say…soul mates? We usually see each other in school and gave each other occasional “hi’s” and “hello’s” whenever we meet along the corridor. Then the time came when I can’t help but take a second glance at you whenever our eyes meet. Maybe there’s something in you, maybe I’m starting to notice your eyes that also smiles whenever you do, or maybe… I’m falling for you. That night was a very memorable one. I don’t ...

Dumating na ba sa buhay mo ang pakiramdam na sana ay bigla ka na lang maglaho sa mundong ibabaw? Iyong tipong mawawala ka, wala ka ng mararamdaman pa at paglisan mo ay walang sinoman ang makakaalaala na nag-exist ka pala. Ako, oo, maraming beses na. Pero iba sa pagkakataon na ito. Hindi ko alam kung ano nga ba ang ipinagkaiba ng nararamdaman ko sa ngayon kesa sa mga sakit na dinanas ko bago ka dumating sa buhay ko. Basta ang tangi ko lang alam, gusto ko na maglaho ora mismo dito sa aking kinauupuan. Sawang-sawa na akong gumising araw-araw na ikaw na lang palagi ang iniisip ko. Kung ano ang ginagawa mo, kung sino ang kasama mo at… kung tulad ko ay naiisip mo pa rin ba ako. Malamang hindi na dahil masaya ka na. Hindi tulad ko na pilit pa rin pinaglalabanan ang lungkot na aking nadarama bawat araw. Sa totoo lang, natatakot akong mag-isa. Pinipilit kong maging masaya kapag may kasamang iba. Ayoko na ngang umuwi dahil batid ko na babalik na naman ako sa dati kong mga gawi. Natatakot ako dah...